Horror Crush: Juilanna Guill

Eight months is too long a time for site to have taken a break. So we ain't wasting anymore time. We are gonna keep on giving you guys fresh reading material by way a second induction into Horror Crushes in just mere days! This time around we add one of the sexiest babes to ever grace a major slasher franchise entry: Juilanna Guill!

Juilanna Guill was born in Winston-Salem, North Carolina in 1987. In 2005, she graduated from Richard J. Reynolds High School. Guill began acting in 2004 appearing in two episodes of One Tree Hill.

Five years later, in 2009, she appeared in the movie where I first saw and got her this induction, the Platinum Dunes remake of Friday the 13th. 

This remake combines the first three movies in a considerably lesser manner, as a bunch of college students shake up a cabin. Said cabin is found in Camp Crystal Lake. Which, of course, has a bad rep cuz some lady, Mrs. Voorhees, lost her marbles after her son drowned, killed some teens, then lost her fucking head by way of a machete. Anyways, along the way Sam from Supernatural looks for his sister. She is being held prisoner by Jason, who in this version does that I guess. Soon Jason starts racking up the body count.

I actually enjoyed this one in the theaters. I mean I didn't think it was amazing or anything, but it seemed fine. However, each viewing I gave it it felt worse than the last. It lacks any suspense, with some scenes going on for too long, even more so in the extended cut. You won't care what happens to anyone even the likable characters, much less the assholes in the movie. While, violent it lacks any actual gore, which is an odd choice and makes it even more flat feeling.

Still, like most of Marcus (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre remake) Nispel's work it is a really good looking movie.  Also, good looking are the women in this flick, with the top honors in that department going to Guill.

Guill plays Bree Turner and is likable in her role. She is also incredible and impossible to forger her. When asshole character in the movie (and definitely one of the worst male characters ever in the genre) cheats on his girlfriend with her, he is amazed by her boobs. And, even though we hate this fucking tool, we have to agree with him! Guill's nude/ sex scene is one of the greatest in the entire franchise. She dances sexily while drinking, then has intercourse with said douchebag, showing literal T&A. 

That same year, she appeared in a made for TV slasher flick from MTV called My Super Psycho Sweet 16. I never even heard of this, but she is one of the main characters, in the form of Madison Penrose. This doesn't seem like anything I ever need to see, but maybe I'm wrong. If I am and you have seen it let me know in the comments section below.

I mean someone like it, cuz a year later it got a fuckin' sequel, as in 2010, we got My Super Psycho Sweet 16 Part 2. Apparently this one has a second sweet 16 party with more killings being committed, cuz, of course, there would be. Again unless, some of you can tell me a good reason to watch I'll continue skipping.

That same year, she continued her time in the genre, with yet another movie that I never heard of, Altitude. Apparently, this one is a sci-fi/ horror flick with teens trapped in a plane that isn't exactly working in top shape. Any of you guys seen this one? 

In 2012, she appeared in Mine Games. This one I did actually see and even reviewed it for my old job at Best Horror Movies, but alas that site has long been closed. So the review no longer exists. All I remember is that it was terrible, and as such I gave it a shitty review, The fact that I don't remember anything beyond that probably says a lot. But, apparently Guill is a bikini, so you know, that has to be worth something, right?

That year also saw Guill's last role, to date, in horror with The Apparition. I last mentioned this one back when I inducted the gorgeous Ashley Green. I had not seen it back then and still haven't. Now that it has two Horror Crushes inductees, should I finally watch it? Or is my life better by still not watching it? Let me know in the comments section below.

And, with that Guill worked her last horror movie, as of this post. In a short period of time, she worked a decent amount of genre output. Admirably, she didn't have the greatest line up of terror flicks, but here is the thing. Her role in the that Friday the 13th remake is one of the most memorable in the entire franchise. And, for that alone she we are honored to have her as an official Horror Crush!

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Horror Crush: Sharlene Martin

It's time for another induction into this site's hallowed section: Horror Crushes! This happens to be, more than likely, the last induction of 2022. And, she is the absolutely gorgeous Sharlene Martin (married name: Sharlene Ludwig)! One of my biggest crushes as a teen, her induction is a no-brainer.

Martin was born in Vancouver, Canada and is, currently, 69 years old. She only has a couple of acting gigs which began back in 1987, with a horror movie, actually called Possession (AKA Possession: Till Death Do Us Part). Honestly, I never heard, much less saw this movie, before today. Apparently, it's about some nut-job named Frankie, who has mommy issues. He stalks Madeleine (Martin, here using the name Melissa Martin) and starts hacking up girls along the way. It doesn't seem to be thought of very highly by fans or critics. But, hey, if you're a fan of it let me know why you like it, or even if you hate it, and, of course, tell me how Martin is in in the comments section below. 

Her next and last horror movie is the one we all know her best from:

Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan. Now, I've shit on this movie plenty of times and with good reason. It is the worst entry, easily, in the entire franchise. It's stupid, takes forever to get to Manhattan (though most was actually shot in Canada), has barely any gore, is fill with godawful characters, and has a really shitty ending. But, it does have some gorgeous ladies in it, including another Horror Crush inductee, Kelly Hu, who plays Eva. She's a nice girl who just happens to be the bestie of Tamara (Martin), who isn't nice and is instead snotty and mean, but, also, hotter than hell. OK, I will say one more nice about this sequel. It's a better movie than Freddy's Dead, Halloween: Resurrection, or Halloween Ends, so it does have going for it as well. Oh and the doggy is adorable, and the title track rocks. See I managed to say more than one nice about it!

Like I said, Martin's character isn't likable, in the least bit, or actually has any real depth beyond being a bitch, But, she does a good enough job bringing her to life. And, honestly, she, and her beauty, are a major highlight in a movie that has so few.

Actually, her performance was burned into my thirteen, or so, year old brain. In particular, two scenes, the first being when she tries to seduce her teacher, to get a passing grade, by marking all the right parts on herself. And, holy shit does have an amazing body or what?!

This precedes her death which isn't exactly amazing. All it amounts to is Jason throwing her into a mirror and then stabbing her with a shard of glass. But, we get the requisite T&A, literally, from her. Which helps to elevate the scene. As a matter fact, she is in my top two or three hottest babes in the entire Friday the 13th franchise. Which is, honestly, saying a lot!

Like, I said that was her last horror role, though, she did appear in the amazing and definitive Friday the 13th documentary, Crystal Lake Memories: The Complete History of Friday the 13th. She still looked amazing and her appearance was one of many highlights of this docu for me. I am just hoping that one day she will do a horror convention, here in the east coast! Note: to my knowledge she has never done a horror con (or any other type), but one can always hope.

She might not have starred in the best genre films, but it's impossible to not crush on her. She clearly has breathtaking beauty and an unforgettable and sexy appearance in horror's longest running franchise. Thus, I feel it is a no-brainer (and, way overdue considering I mentioned possibly inducting her way back when I inducted Kelly Hu) that Sharlene Martin is now an official Horror Crush!

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Monster-Mania August 2022

 August 13, 2022 marked my return to Monster-Mania after not having been there since 2019. I went there with my friend and Master's Minion, Freddie. It was a packed show, both in terms of guests and attendees. A lot came for the Scream reunion, especially for David Arquette and Matthew Lillard, both who had insane lines (Arquette's line looked like absolute nightmare!). But, since I like but am not the biggest fan of that franchise and figured the horrors the Arquette line would be, it really wasn't any loss to me. 

To me, as a ridiculously HUGE Aliens fan, the person I was most pumped to meet was Carrie Henn. She was a little girl when she played Newt in James Cameron's superior, classic sci-fi/ action/ horror sequel. She is rare to cons, in fact, this might only be her second one. Anywho, she is a teacher, nowadays and was so sweet and friendly in person. It was a great way for our day to start. 

Up next for me was Lynn Eastman- Rossi, who played Sally in Don Coscarelli's classic Phantasm. That's one of my favorite movies, and she really doesn't do a lot of cons, if any, either. As such, she was another actress I was excited to meet. The wife of Leo (Halloween II, Maniac Cop 2) Rossi (who was signing autographs right next to her), she's appeared in many other movies, like Night of the Demon (1983) and the underrated Unlawful Entry. She was incredibly amicable and down to earth, in person. We talked about how nice the Tall Man, himself, Angus Scrimm was. I told that he was the first celeb that I ever met, when I was about 13 or so. She also told me that she and her hubby were gonna take a vacation after the weekend of the con was over. Like, I said incredibly sweet and humble in person.

The next celeb I met was dying to do so was Debra S. Hayes, AKA Claudette, the girl of the couple to get killed first in the classic opening to slasher masterpiece Friday the 13th (1980). The fact that she is one of the first two victims in one of horror's most prolific franchise made her a must meet! And, as I have said before, to me the first remains, easily the best in the series and one of the greatest slashers ever made. Anywho, she was very sweet and all smiles in person.  

This cosplay of Spikey from Killer Klowns from Outer Space was probably my favorite cosplay that I saw at the con!

After getting some lunch (which we had to walk to Dunkin Donuts for cause there was a half hour wait for food on top of the half hour we had already waited to get to the front of the line...), we went back to meeting celebs. And, we met the absolutely gorgeous Julie (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Dexter) Benz. She has long been one of my favorite actresses and my actual favorite on Buffy/ Angel, where she played vampire hottie and Angel's sire, Darla. I actually met her years ago at a Chiller, where I only got her autograph and not a pic with her. This time, I did the opposite and finally got a pic with her! 

She is absolutely AMAZING in person, as she talked to us for a good amount of time. We even talked about doggies, including hers and the loss of mine. She was so sweet and friendly. Not only does she look amazing, and clearly doesn't age (maybe she is really a vampire!), but also one of the nicest celebs I've ever met at a con. I did mention that I had met her at a Chiller ages ago. She thought about it for a bit and then was like she was in her 20s when she did that con!

The last person that I went up to was Zach (Gremlins 1&2, Waxwork 1&2) Galligan. Despite the fact that the two Gremlins movies are two of my favorite movies of all time, I had never gone up to him. I finally did and got a great pic with him!

These are the autographs that I got on that day. All are my discs from my collection:
Aliens: Carrie Henn

Friday the 13th: Debra S. Hayes

Phantasm: Lynn Eastman-Rossi

This is all the swag that I bought:

Phummy plush by Kid Robot of King Ghidorah

Thundarr the Barbarian: The Complete Series on Blu-Ray (which I bought of Diabolik DVD's booth)

Universal Monsters Creature from the Black Lagoon Gill-Man from Jada Toys

The Evil Dead and Maniac T-shirts from Fright-Rags.

I had a great time, and all of the celebs that we met were so nice. That being said, we were exhausted by the end of the day. 

Before I go I felt it would be wrong of me to not bring up that Gary Busey was kicked out of Monster-Mania on Sunday for alleged sexual offense charges. These is obviously disgusting and abhorrent behavior. You can read more about it here.

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The 10 Best Horror Movies of 1980

Ah, the 1980's, perhaps the most beloved decade for horror movies ever and understandably so. While, I personally prefer the 70's (I LOVE the grittiness and boldness of that era!), the 80's is easily, and by far, my second favorite era. A long time ago, I actually did a list of the top of each decade (more or less), but I feel it's time to redo that. So, if you read those pieces (the 80s one, in particular) ignore those and think of this as the TRUE official list by me, Master Gio!

We begin with the first year, with many of these movies being produced or still influenced by the 70's, this is a much more gritty batch of movies that what was to come. You'll see a good amount of Italian horror here and beyond, because, let's face it, they were making the best genre flicks on the fucking planet. So let's get to this list!

Honorable Mentions: 
The Fog
Altered States

Don't Answer the Phone
The Shining 

10. Inferno- The second installment in Dario Argento's Three Mother's Trilogy is one of his most beautiful movies. It is also quite possibly his most incomprehensible. Plot and story are thrown out the fucking window. But, that is fine when the movie, itself, is this wild and over the top. A visually stunning tour-de-force, it also has some great gory kills, an amazing soundtrack, and beautiful women, in other words everything you have come to love and expect in an Argento flick.





9. Don't Go in the House- This mean little psycho slasher has some incredibly strong acting, especially from Dan Grimaldi as the whack-job with a thing for fire. Well, fire and immolating setting beautiful women  with his flame thrower in a steel room that he creates. Disturbing and dark, this one of those early "nasty slashers" that will get under your skin.






8. Doctor Butcher M.D. (AKA Zombie Holocaust)- This wild and fun Italian gorefest combines two of Italy's most popular horror sub-genres, zombies and cannibals. And, it does the later without any of the vile animal killing or more depressing aspects. As a matter of fact, it is an absolute blast to watch. Check out my retrospective on it here.







7. Mother's Day- This early release from Troma Films, from Lloyd Kaufman's own brother Charles Kaufman, is a dark as fuck black comedy mixed with a rape/ revenge and killer hill-billy movie. Three pretty city girls are kidnapped, humiliated, beaten, raped, and one even killed by two cretins and their psychotic mother. It is a very nasty flick with graphic violence and unsavory subject matter. But, it is all well done and worthy of its cult status. I mean, no less an expert than Eli Roth has sung its praises. It also inspired a very different and, in my humble opinion even better remake in 2010.

6. Maniac- William Lustig's controversial, disturbing, and extremely graphic slasher was once condemned as misogynistic crap. But, over time it got recognized as the classic it was meant to be. That never softened its image, though. Joe Spinell gives an amazing performance as the psycho killer who hunts down, brutally kills beautiful women, and scalps them for use with his mannequins. Tom Savini's gore effects are realistic and and along with its dark mood really set itself apart from the stalk and slash movies that were to come.

5. Dressed to Kill- Brain De Palma's mix of psycho horror and erotic thriller ranks among the master's best work in the genre. The exhilarating and violent elevator attack, which was one of the scenes that needed to be cut down to get an R-rating, is one of my favorite scenes in any De Palma flick. Well, acted, sexy, stylish, and bloody, he is at the top his game, before his several missteps to come.






4. City of the Living Dead (AKA The Gates of Hell)- Lucio Fulci's supernatural zombie flick is low on plot but high on style and splatter. A priest hangs himself and opens the gates of hell. The film drips with atmosphere and blood, with at least two scenes that rank among the best gore scenes by anyone (a hot girl barfing up her guts and some weird dude getting a power-drill inside one side of his out the other). Plus, cult favorites Christopher George and the beautiful Catriona MacCall make for very likable heroes. And, sure the ending doesn't make a lot of sense, but this time around you won't care. Trust me!


3. Humanoids from the Deep- This is a wild and bloody monster romp from Roger Corman's production company. In it, sea monsters kill men and rape women for mating purposes. Aside from the dog killings at the beginning, this one is always a blast to watch and something that would NEVER be made today. You can read more of my thought on it here.







2. Cannibal Holocaust- Ruggero Deodato's masterpiece is perhaps the single most controversial horror film in cinema history. And, while yes the real animal violence is utterly repellent and completely deplorable, there is nonetheless a great movie in here. One that haunts you days after you see it and exploits what it also seems to condemn. The definitive and greatest extreme horror movie ever made, I go into further detail about it here.





1. Friday the 13th- One of the most oft-ripped-off horror films in history, this excellent trendsetter is a classic of the genre. Unlike its brain-dead sequels and the wanna-bes it inspired, Sean Cunningham's splatter flick is actually scary and builds suspense excellently. Between its likable characters, good acting, graphic FX by Savini, classic score, excellent climax, and one of the greatest endings in genre history, there is no doubt about it: Friday the 13th is the best horror movie of 1980 and one of the greatest slashers ever fucking made.




What are your choices for the best horror movies of 1980? Let me know in the comments section below. And, keep your eyes open for 1981!

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